"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.'" -Judy Garland
I went FAR too long not liking the version of me. What wasted time... Now I ROCK it, own it, LOVE it and cherish it. I'm bettering, strengthening, nurturing, fueling, challenging this version every single day.
I've been on both sides of this coin: Working Mom/Work From-Home-Mom. And as a current work-from-home mom, I've been paying attention to all the talk going around, and it feels like an opportune time to chat a little bit about what exactly working from home entails, and well... how much it sometimes kinda blows.
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE what I do but I think it's time we pulled back the curtains and gave you a little glimpse of reality.. FYI: As I write this I am sitting in my bed because our the house cleaner has brought her daughter to help today and apparently they are not getting along and would like for me to decide the argument, my daughter has decided to crawl up next to me and bring 2 dogs and a cat.. our 3rd dog is running around barking at the vacuum cleaner.. and there goes the door bell for the THRID time!
Fantasy: You can work in your pajamas. OK yes, you can work in your pajamas. But, I think people assume that that equates to a clean pair of lululemon yoga pants and a super cute tank top. Hey, in this daydream, can our thighs also not touch, and can the sports bra we have on make it look like we have two boobs, not just one giant uni-boob? Because the reality is that we're not in any of that, we're in a baggy sweatshirt, borderline muumuu, with holes and food stains: that's not fairy glitter it's Hot Pocket sauce and Cheetos dust.
Reality: No one believes you have a real job. Can we watch your kid? Pick up your prescription? Get your dad from the airport? No, we can't. Why? Because we still have freaking jobs, dude. We have deadlines, monthly goals, conference calls, we use words like "team building" and "bonus volume" and look, we have business cards and everything! Don't let the lack of office fool you, we're honest-to-goodness productive members of society, it's just that the majority of our productivity happens in our underpants.
Fantasy: You don't have to deal with asshole co-workers. Listen, just because they don't get paychecks or pay taxes doesn't mean the little people who run around our home offices aren't tyrants with no concern for anyone's needs but their own. Sure, Jan from accounting was a douche bag to deal with sometimes, but at least you weren't forced to LIVE with her.
Reality: There is very little human interaction. We're in a entrepreneurial field, so we're weird and socially awkward by default, but the truth is, when you work from home, aside from the team calls or random Google hangout, the most person-to-person contact you may have is with the mail guy, and he doesn't have all day to sit there and listen to you talk about feelings or last night's episode of "SOA," apparently. Your spouse is working, and your friends have jobs, too. Even if you had a second to chat, nobody else does, so eventually, you just start talking to random strangers at Target, but even then, they only have so much time to ask you to swipe your card and would you like paper or plastic.
Fantasy: You can drink on the job. All right, I guess you can technically drink on the job. In fact, some of our best work comes from the bottom of a wine bottle, but a warning, you can only confuse words like "public" with "pubic" so many times before people are like, What the hell is wrong with you?
Fantasy: You save money. Working from home means saving money on things like gas, vehicle maintenance and those weird polyester blend business slacks that can only be worn over two layers of shaping undergarments, lest your ass look like someone shoved two giant dimpled golf balls down the back of your pants.
Reality: You don't get to clock out. This is especially true if you own your own business. There are no set work hours, because all the hours are work hours. We work where we live, so every moment feels like a moment we could/should be working, until eventually you have this claustrophobic breakdown where you feel like you never leave your office and it melts into, like, this creepy Jodi Foster panic room, and you never ever get to escape, ever. It's hard to turn that off. If we sit down on the toilet and realize we don't have our phone with us, you can bet your wet ass we're doing the pants down shimmy to grab it fast. If we go out to eat, before you ask for a refill we've already checked in, tweeted, status updated and Instagrammed our entire encounter, you know, for work.
Fantasy: Being your own boss is awesome. By in-office boss standards, you are awesome. The kind that values an employee who spends two hours catching up on Ben Affleck's facial hair and Kim Kardashian and Kanye's love child. But when you're still up working at 1 a.m., making up for all those hours spent celeb-stalking and pinning shit, you begin to miss the fear your old boss instilled in you that kept you continually meeting deadlines despite having to look over your shoulder, poised to drop your browser window at the faintest sound of their approach. You know, the kind of boss that would call you on your craptastic idea to institute afternoon naps to "jumpstart your creative process." Ugh, fact is, you're probably the worst boss ever.
Don't take any sh**.
Stand up for yourself; give yourself a voice.
Don't see other women as your competition, see them as your allies.
Support each other, champion each other.
Put your future in your own hands.
Approach life with a positive outlook, you are in charge of your own happiness.
If you're determined to succeed, you're going to succeed.
Say goodbye to those who don't add something to your life.
Don't be afraid to be selfish.
Keep your brow game strong and always have coffee at the ready...
This is your year, take it.
Hey mammas! Here's a reminder to us. 🙏🏼For the mom feeling weighed down by guilt and doubt at the end of the day: You have the EXACT qualities God knew your kids would need in a mother. So, when you get up today, hold up your willingness and ask God to make you the best version of you that you can possibly be.❤❤❤❤❤
I have to tell you about my Dahlia. I babied this thing all summer, had it in the perfect sunlight, kept the moisture perfect.... loved on it and waited... and waited.. and waited. All summer long I never gave up on it, but in it's "obvious" season it never bloomed, not once.
Sadly a couple of weeks ago as the weather started to turn I pulled it up onto the patio, out of the sun, away from any rain. I assumed I'd replace it with a mum as Fall sat in.
Tonight, it's cold... definitely NOT when this beauty "should have" bloomed. But there there she is! God sends the most amazing messages sometimes.
It IS my season, friends. Watch me bloom.
Some people are gonna be really freaked out, pissed off, and downright unhappy for your growth.
Your success will scare them.🏆
Your spiritual evolution will annoy them.🙏🏼
Your happiness will anger them.🤓
Your transformation will shine a light on their decision to remain tight inside their own bud.
But none of that is your problem.
You've got bigger things to do that manage someone else's insecurities.
Much bigger things.💕🦄✌🏼
I am SO exhausted with all the media messaging that makes women feel bad about themselves and their bodies.
I've never been one to be attracted to the typical "good looking" person and I've never felt any woman was more beautiful than another simply based on aesthetics. And the more I evolve the more this rings true. I believe people are the prettiest when they're speaking from their hearts.
When they're leading with love.
When they're letting their light shine and bringing good things to the world.
When they believe in themselves.
Don't let ANYONE make you feel less beautiful or less perfect than you are. Don't let anyone make you feel you need to look a certain way to be worthy of love, fulfilling relationships, amazing experiences, or a great career. Let your energy shine through always. Let your vibe be your guide. ✨✨✨✨✨